Wednesday, September 3, 2008

Pete Rose Reinstated By MLB, Playing Under Various Phillies Aliases

During last night's Phillies/Nationals game, Philadelphia second baseman Chase Utley, who was at third base, took off for home when Washington pitcher John Lannan attempted a pick off at first base. Utley was tagged out at home, but not before sending Nationals catcher Jesus Flores to the hospital with a sprained ankle. Now, in a photo of the play obtained by The Phunyun, it appears the player racing home was not Utley, but former Phillie Pete Rose.

Last night marked the third time this season a Phillies player attempted to take out an opposing team's catcher. Earlier this season Eric Bruntlet gave Cardinals catcher Yadier Molina a concussion and in July, Shane Victorino ran over Braves catcher Brian McCann. But an investigation by The Phunyun shows these plays, and the Utley play last evening, were actually the work of Pete Rose, who in 1989 was banned from baseball.

Sources from within Major League Baseball confirm that a plan was devised in May to allow Rose to return to the game, first by assuming the role of other players. The MLB hired famed Hollywood make-up artist Terri Simon to make Rose look like a number of Phillies players throughout the season. Each of the plays in question are eerily similar to the infamous "Ray Fosse incident" Rose was involved in in 1970.

Phillies manager Charlie Manuel refused to confirm that Rose was playing for his team, but he did say, "Pete Rose ain't never worn no lipstick or rouge, I'll tell ya that."

Spokespeople for the Braves, Cardinals and Nationals each said they are considering disputing the games in which Rose was involved.

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